Krypton

by Valerie Hall

The Noble Gases Dating Service

(Where the inactive gases get a life.)

Hello my name is Krypton. I don’t usually do this sort of thing but here it goes. I heard about the Noble Gases Dating Service from my best friend Argon. He told me that he had made a video and as many as 10 female noble gases had called him. So I decided to give it a try. Well, as I said before my name is Krypton. When scientists were producing my mother, Oxygen, from my father, Liquid Air, I was created. I have Atomic Weight of 83.8 grams and an Atomic Number of 36. I am colorless but I have a great personality, I have been told I light up a room! I am a very inactive gas but I enjoy hiking, swimming, and dancing.

You may be wondering what this outfit is all about. Well, you see I am also known as Super Krypton. I fly around and help out the people of the world. I assist them in lighting their houses with fluorescent and incandescent lamps. I really enjoy my job. Oh yeah, and it really attracts women.

On a date I would take you to dinner and dancing. I would greet you at your door with a bouquet of 8 neon roses. I would then fly you away to my favorite restaurant, Group 0. Only us Noble Gases are allowed in. We would spend the evening there eating and dancing. Then I would fly you home and drop you off at your door. I would make sure your house was well lit and then return to my house.

I have found that I work well as a couple with any Radon element. I feel it is because both of our atomic numbers end in a six. But I am will try a relationshipwith other Noble Gases. I think that Neon, Argon, Xenon, and Radon are all beautiful in their inactive and colorless bodies.

I enjoy cold temperatures. My boiling point is -152 C and my melting point is -157.3 C. I have a very low density of 2.6g/ml. But I am very smart. I can remain stable at all times and light up rooms.

To tell you about myself I have constructed a poem to say to you today:

My name is Krypton and I am a mole,

I can light up a room quick if you’re in a fix.

Well, that is all there is to know about me. I really have no more to say. All I can hope is that you find me attractive and call me. Us Noble Gases must stick together. See you around.

(For those of you out there who are not clear on what exactly mole is here’s an explanation. It is not a real mole, like the one in Caddy Shack, but a unit of measurement. The weight of one 6.02 x 10 grams. It is used to tell the amount of a substance in grams that is equal to the substances molecular mass. It is also known as Avogadro’s Number.)